I miss you like crazy. All the time. Don't worry, I'm still moving on with my life, especially because I know you'd come back and kick my ass if I sat around feeling sorry for myself. But it still sucks.
So much is happening right now that I want you to be a part of. The wedding, more than anything. I know one of our biggest problems when you were here was how independent and stubborn I could be, but right now I really need my mom. Don't worry, I've got an incredible support system around me, but it still hurts to know that you'll never see me in my dress, or clip my veil into my hair.
I think you'd really love what we're doing with the wedding- it is completely us. And you will be there. In the plates, the flowers, in our hearts and laughter, you will be there. I just wish, more than anything, that you could be there in person to tell me how proud you are. I know you have always been proud of me, but I never realized how much hearing those words meant until I couldn't hear them anymore.
I love you, Mom. So incredibly much. And I am so proud and so happy that I got to be your daughter, even though 22 years just wasn't enough. But you will always be with me. Today, on my wedding day, when your grandchildren are born, I will always take you with me- you are a part of me.
I love you, Mom. And I hope that wherever you are, that you're dancing the night away with Dad, with Sadie next to you wagging her tail to the beat.